I’ve
had two enlightening insights into me and my walk with Christ in the past few
days. The first involves my relationship
with Christ and how He sees me. The
second deals with my role as a musician helping to lead worship at my church
every Sunday.
As
some of you know, my wife and I are dealing with infertility. At times, I’ve felt a like I’m stuck in a
modern day equivalent of the book of Job.
I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this. As I mentioned in the intro to this series, I’m
not exactly the best at the whole daily devotional thing. Talking to God each morning has been, is, and
probably will be a struggle for me. Of
course, like many people, I’m better at it now that I have a problem I can’t
fix. And, once it’s fixed, I’ll go back
to regular old me. You know, the one
with no time for God each morning. That’s
where this first revelation comes in.
The
other day Renee and I had a chance to meet with another couple who has
struggled with infertility as well. One
of the things he mentioned was that Jesus desires to be our father in the same
way he wanted to be a father. In fact,
Jesus desires it even more. That struck
a chord with me. I have had “baby fever”
for quite awhile now. The desire to be a
father, to have a child to love on and care for is rather strong. Jesus has an even stronger desire to be my
heavenly father. He longs to love on me
and care for me and I just blow Him off, except when I need something. I’m that poor college kid who only calls home
because he needs money from Mom and Dad.
Christ doesn’t just want me to call when I need help; He wants me to
call when something great happens. He
wants me to call just to say “what’s up.”
He wants to be not just our heavenly Father, but our heavenly Dad. I’m still parsing out the implications of
this insight, but I’m praying it permanently changes my relationship.
The
second insight is maybe a little less profound, but still important. I was reading “The Heart of Worship Files”
this morning and Matt Redman’s essay ‘Revelation and Response.’ In it, Redman addresses the motives of a
worship leader:
In
some church services, it’s obvious that the worship leader is consumed, above
all else, with getting a response from the people. Not much is implied about the integrity and
heart of the offerings. Instead comes a
barrage of forceful encouragements to shout, clap, dance or anything else you
can think of. Instead of focusing on
bringing a true and meaningful overflow of the heart, leaders have settled for
some sort of spiritual disco competition with a prize for the wildest
participant. (The Heart of Worship Files, pg 14)
I think many of us have been to a service like this at
one point or another. We aren’t really
feeling the shouting/clapping/dancing and, somehow, we are lesser because of it. So we raise our hands and join in the
clapping because it’s better to fake it that to be looked down upon.
This
is exactly the motive that Redman is addressing. As Redman sees it, “worship is always a
response to a revelation” (pg 13). The
job of a worship leader or worship band is to provide songs that reveal God’s
character. If the songs being sung show
Christ’s character, then the response will take care of itself. Sometimes the response to the song will be
clapping, or dancing, or lifting hands, or kneeling in prayer. But that has to come out of a genuine response to the worship, not
because the guy on stage with the mic told us to do it.
Here’s
the funny thing. When I see that
response and I know it is coming from a genuine response to the song or the set,
I feel so much more joy walking off stage.
That true worship is an indication that we, as a band, have done our
job. We have led the congregation in
worship and revealed something of who Christ is in the process. In our capacity as the worship band, we have
been effective ministers of the Gospel.
Nothing beats that feeling.
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